Confusion Tolerance
by redbanker
Summary: Set after S3 finale, Charlie has some secrets. Mention of Slash, no bashing of any characters. I hope you enjoy. Disclaimer; I own nothing.


This is my first Numb3rs story and it's been floating around my head since the Season Three finale. Unfortunately I was in the middle of a massive HP/SN crossover and didn't have the time to put it down in words. Then after I was done with that story I found the desire to even try lacking. The previous story had been a year in the writing and was over 100,000 words long. But then as usual my muse wouldn't let me be and I found the idea of writing this story more and more appealing as I had no intention of allowing this to become and epic adventure and so at last I sat down and hammered it out. I hope everyone enjoys it and please pardoned any errors. This little ditty hasn't been beta'd and is simply the effort of a quiet afternoon on the couch.

Confusion Tolerance

Don didn't like knowing what was going on. It was a control issue and one that he was very much aware he possessed. You grow up with a math genius and you walk around most of the time feeling like an idiot.

Over the years he'd learned to cope with having Charlie as his brother and could honestly say the two were now friend and becoming closer with each year they worked together. But Don really was in the mood to be nice to anyone today. It had been a long week and the upcoming week wasn't looking any better.

This whole Colby situation had thrown everyone for a loop and now Charlie and called and asked if Don would get Megan and David and meet him at the house on a Saturday morning at 8:00am. It was not leading Don to being in a good mood.

"Did Charlie say why he wanted to see us all?" Megan asked always look to gain understanding of a situation before jumping to conclusions.

"No." Don growled out with evident frustration. "He just made me promise to get you guys here no matter what."

"That doesn't sound like Charlie." David's voice showing the stress and anger the younger agent had gone through the previous week with Colby's apparent betrayal.

"Actually it's a lot like Charlie." Alan commented as he came out of the house with Larry in tow. "He always forgets to mention the details."

"Dad, Larry, he dragged you into this too?" Don now looked really surprised and annoyed.

"Yes, Charles was very adamant about my being here this morning. I must say now seeing the assembled group I'm most intrigued by what Charles has in mind." Larry commented sparing a smile for Megan that she returned.

"Well if he doesn't hurry up and show I'm leaving, I've got better things to do on my day off. Don grumbled.

At that moment a large black SUV pulled up and the man in question jumped out looking very much like he'd consumed enough caffeine to power a nuclear power plant.

"Oh good, you're all here. Well come on get in. We've got to go. Here Megan you go first." Charlie babbled as he began to usher the group into the car.

"Charlie what the hell is going on?" Don practically shouted. He'd scoped out the driver of the SUV and Don would swear the guy was government. And knowing Charlie that meant NSA.

"Don I promise I'm going to explain everything, but please just stop being a dick for a second and get in the damn car." Charlie practically shouted back his eyes both pleading and desperate.

Don relented in his usual way saying nothing but climbing into the SUV without another word.

When all the passengers were inside at last Charlie climbed into the front seat so that he could speak to everyone in the car. Waiting until the car was moving Charlie nervously ran his fingers through his hair and cleared his throat. "Okay I know you're all wondering what's going on, so I'm going to explain. I hope I can get it all done before we arrive so I'm going to ask you to please, please not interrupt until I'm done." The last was directed mostly between Don and Alan and both men simply nodded without saying a word.

"Thank you." Charlie replied as he began to squirm in his seat. "Okay so where to start." Charlie continued to fidget. "I had this all planed out in my head but now, God I don't even know where to begin."

"It's okay, Charlie just take your time." Megan coached gently. Charlie's obvious distress bringing the womans empathetic nature out while putting her curiosity on hold.

"Right, thanks Megan." Charlie smiled gratefully. "Okay, okay. So obviously this is an NSA car and the guy driving an NSA agent. As you know I've consulted for the NSA for a while now. What I never told you was the reason why I began consulting for the NSA in the first place."

"You said Assistant Director Tompkins called you in a few years ago." Don said remembering the case that had changed his perception of his brother drastically.

"And that was true." Charlie said looking Don in the eye. "But it wasn't the whole truth. I left out a few details. Details, Don that I couldn't share at the time." Charlie's eyes pleaded with his older brother to understand.

"But now you can?" Alan asked looking both confused and worried. "I mean Charlie you're not in trouble or anything are you?"

"No more then usual, Dad." Charlie answered. "What I left out, Don was that when I said the NSA contacted me a few years ago I was stretching the truth a bit. It was actually ten years ago and it wasn't so that I could help them but rather they were protecting me." Charlie admitted at last feeling a weight begin to rise off his shoulders.

"Protect you from what, Charlie?" Don's voice hardened as his protective nature kicked in at the thought of anything happening to Charlie, letting the shock of Charlie's admission fade into the background for the moment.

"Don you've seen how useful my work has been to the FBI." Charlie answered. "Well I also consult for almost every government agency in the US. Even before the NSA I consulted for the IRS, the State Department, the D.O.T., hell even Homeland security. I mean I was apart of so many different projects sometimes I have trouble remembering them all." Charlie admitted. "Bottom line, Don my continued work with so many different organizations had made me a target for enemies of the US who were looking to hit the US any way they could. I wasn't publishing my work or anything." Charlie quickly assured seeing the look of comprehension on the faces of Megan and Larry. "But imagine if you will a terrorist wanted to get illegal weapons into the US by boat, what would be more helpful."

"Then the mathematician who had helped create the algorithm that determined what was safe to let in and what was not." Larry spoke up at last his face showing deep concern for his dear friends safety.

"Or if someone wanted to let loose a chemical bomb who would be more helpful then a guy who could predict the best location in any city to do the most damage." David theorized beginning to see Charlie in a whole new light. "I've always focused on all the good you do for us, I never thought about whether or not the other guys realized what you could do for them." David admitted.

"To be honest, David neither did I." Charlie admitted. "Not until I was walking back to my office one day and was intercepted by two NSA agents who were there to protect me from a kidnapping attempt."

"Charlie how could you not tell me this." Don shouted terror making his voice waver.

"Charlie when did this happen." Alan asked at the same time his words and Don's overlapping in fear and frustration.

"I couldn't, Don." Charlie answered his voice once more pleading for patience and understanding. "And, Dad it was ten years ago nothing happened they never got close to me. The NSA agents intercepted them before they could even get to my office." Charlie assured.

"What happened after that, Charlie?" Megan asked trying to remain calm as she processed all the information Charlie was throwing on them.

"They asked me to come to Washington with them where I met Bob Tompkins who explained to me why this was happing and what the NSA planned to do about it." Charlie replied closing his eyes as he remembered that fateful meeting and how scared he'd been at the time.

"And that was?" Don asked looking ready to rip someones head off with his bare hands.

"Well first. I was injected with an organic tracking device that is undetectable by anything other then an NSA satellite that monitors, where I am at all times, as well as my heart rate and other indicators of distress or trouble." Charlie assured Don and was relieved to see Don nod his head and begin to breath more easily. "Also there was to be three agents near me at all times rotating on a monthly schedule and using not just NSA agents but agents pulled from the Secret Service, CIA, and CID." Charlie continued. I never know where they are or even who they are but I've been assured their always around." Charlie shook his head still to this day amazed at all that went into to keeping him safe from harm.

"Well then where the hell were they during the damn sniper case?" Don exploded needing some outlet to express the hurricane of emotions that were boiling through his mind. "I mean you were nearly killed if it hadn't been for Edgerton..." Don trailed off looking at Charlie who was looking both sheepish and guilty. "Ian..?" He asked waiting for Charlie to deny this was even a possibility.

"I checked later and yes, Ian was one of the agents brought in to keep me from harm." Charlie ran his hands through his hair allowing his own frustration to color his voice. "You have to understand, Don I never wanted to know too much about the agents guarding me, I didn't want to know the number of times I was almost kidnapped or even just killed. God, Don sometimes it was just easier for me to block it all out and continue on as if nothing had changed." Charlie rested his head on the seat taking deep breaths to calm his own racing heart.

"My God, Charlie." Alan whispered looking old and frightened.

"Charles is there more?" Larry queried softly seeing the look on Charles' face as one he recognized from a few years earlier when Charles had needed his help with a case for the FBI but had been unable to divulge any details due to being sworn to secrecy.

"An agent was also enrolled at Cal Sci to be there as both a bodyguard and someone who could assist me with my work since I kept getting busier and busier with various agencies seeking consultations." Charlie let a small smile cross his face as he looked at Don and was pleased to see a small smile on Don's face as well.

"Good Lord, Charlie when do you sleep?" David spoke up breaking the tension in the car as everyone laughed at the look of rueful consternation on Charlie's face.

"Why do you think I always look so harried." Charlie answered back running his hand across his face emphasizing the day old stubble he hadn't had time to shave. "I know it sounds like a lot, but most of these consultations are only once a year." Charlie explained his voice once more becoming serious as he still had two secrets he needed to share, well three actually, he corrected himself mentally shooting a worried look at Don and Alan.

"Amita." Larry whispered looking at Charles in wonderment. "While he'd appreciated the humor David's comment had induced Charles' previous statement had been running through his mind nonstop. "That's why she's not with us?" Larry continued as the SUV had fallen silent as he began to speak. "I was wondering but now it all makes sense."

Charlie looked at his best friend and mentor and let out a grateful sigh before speaking, "Yes Amita is the NSA agent that enrolled in Cal Sci. Her own interests in Physics as well as Probability Theory made her the perfect mole as well as her appearance being so unassuming that she would never be perceived as a threat."

"Amita?" Alan leaned forward till his hands were resting on the front seat. "You're former TA and sometime potential girlfriend is actually an NSA agent."

"Yes." Charlie answered knowing the shocks were not over just yet. "But she's not my girlfriend." Charlie stated looking like what he was about to say was the very last thing in the world he wanted to reveal.

"So you just pretended to date to have a reason for her to remain close to you?" Megan theorized her inner profiler beginning to pick up signals that more was to come and it was going to be big.

"Yes." Charlie answered before plowing ahead before he could get interrupted again. "You see for the last six years I've been in a committed relationship with someone I love so much that I sometimes can't see straight." Charlie paused and waited for the explosion that he knew would be coming from his father.

"What?!" Alan sat up straight looking both thrilled to death and disbelieving at the same time. "Charlie this is great I mean all I ever wanted for my boys, but how could you not tell me, where is she, what does she do." Alan babbled.

Megan put her hand over her mouth to hide the grin on her face as Alan's ramblings reminded her so much of Charlie at the moment she was afraid she would laugh out loud.

Don was also looking amused though rolling his eyes as well at his fathers never-ending desire for his sons to get married and have kids. "Well I have to say, Chuck that's actually the best news you've revealed all day. Totally takes the pressure off me to settle down, seems like you've taken care of that for me." Don clapped Charlie on the shoulder but then felt his gut tighten at the look of misery written on Charlie's face. "Charlie what is it?" Don asked softly.

Charlie tried to smile but it came out as more of a grimace as he whispered so softly the rest of the car had to strain to hear him quietly utter, "I'm afraid it's still up to you to provide grandchildren, Don."

"Did something happen to her?" Don asked feeling his chest tighten at the pain he heard in Charlie's voice.

"No, Don." Charlie once more whispered. "But it's also not a her." Charlie let the secret he'd been hiding from his father and brother over the last eight years finally come to light.

Alan sat back looking stunned as Don continued to squeeze his brothers shoulder. "You're gay?" Don asked at last his voice sympathetic to the struggle Charlie was going through.

"Yes." Charlie answered as he began to feel like a robot answering yes over and over again.

"Charlie why didn't you ever say anything?" Don asked forcing Charlie to look him in the eyes. "I know it's just been in the last couple of years that we've become close again but you couldn't have thought this would change anything? You're my brother I want you to be happy and well it it's a guy that makes you happy I'm not, I mean I hope you didn't think." Don found himself at a loss for words unable to ask if Charlie had actually believed Don would turn his back on his brother for being gay.

"No, Don." Charlie answered his voice laced with conviction. "But it wasn't that simple." Charlie reassured. "I mean yes, I was worried a little about how you and Dad would react to me being gay but I never really thought, that is to say, I never, I mean okay maybe in a worst case scenario, I might have run a few projections based on past behavior." Charlie began to ramble this day being equally hard on him as it has proved to be on the other passengers in the car.

"Charlie," Megan interrupted seeing that both Alan and Don seemed to need a few minutes to process the latest piece of information.

"Charlie, did Margaret know?" Alan asked before Megan could ask a question that would veer away from the topic at hand.

"I never told her, if that's what you're asking." Charlie's voice was laced with familiar pain and deep love as he spoke of his lost mother. "But you know how mom was. I always thought she knew, or at least suspected. She was always so perceptive of people and what they were going through. Don's so much like her in that way."

"Yeah well." Don rubbed the back of his neck both secretly thrilled and uncomfortable at the amazing compliment Charlie had just bestowed upon him.

"Your mother was a very special woman." Alan agreed feeling amazingly relieved to know he hadn't been the reason Charlie had been afraid to reveal this latest secret.

"The main reason I didn't tell you had nothing to do with fear of how you'd react, or well not completely how you'd react." Charlie let a real smile cross his face as he gazed at his family with love and gratefulness. "All right let's go back to the beginning. Six years ago I was called in to help the NSA with a joint operation with the CID. It seemed that the CID was becoming aware that they had a mole within their operation working for enemy government's." Charlie was aware he was being vague on the details but he wanted to explain the situation full before hitting his friends with his last big shock of the day.

Charlie paused as the black SUV exited from the highway indicating they weren't far from their destination and Charlie needed to speak up if he wanted to finish before they arrived.

"When I began to analyze the data they had collected, I began to realize that not only was there more then one mole, but I was looking at what appeared to be long term infiltration in various government agencies that had been going on for the last fifteen years." Charlie nodded at the looks of shock and concern or Don, Megan, and David's face.

"What a minute." Don began to speak the obvious question on his mind.

"I was introduced to a CID operative." Charlie continued holding up a hand to ward of Don's question for the moment. "This operative had been the one to bring the initial observation to his superiors at the CID. He was about to be discharged from the army so to keep him viable as an asset Bob had recruited him to the NSA. We spent six months working together on the data and collecting information." Charlie couldn't keep the love and obvious affection out of his voice.

Megan smiled as she discreetly took Larry's hand grateful for her own opportunity to find someone to love.

David sat back and listened to Charlie as the pain over his partners betrayal once more consumed his chest making it feel like a hundred pound weight was pressing down on him.

"As more data came in we began to get a clearer picture of what we were dealing with and the ramifications were stunning. There were over 28 moles working for the same government that were placed through various branches of the US law enforcement agencies. Once our discovering was shown to both the NSA and the CID we were to brief the Joint Chiefs and the operation was classified Top Secret on the highest levels." Charlie paused briefly to take a sip of water before continuing.

"After creating 10 different scenarios to uncover the mole agents we began to realize we had an even bigger problem." Charlie shook his head as he remembered the weeks of fear and frustration that had consumed his every waking minute while at the same time fighting the uncontrollable attraction and love that he'd felt blossoming between him and the NSA operative.

"A bigger problem, God, Charlie what could be bigger the that?" Don growled his own bias coloring his tone.

"We began to realize that each mole while operating individually of each other, there was one mole in place just to monitor the situation and send out operational instructions. One mole so highly placed that any endeavor to halt the infiltration would be in danger of being uncovered and the agents life forfeit." Charlie explained the numbers that never lied running through his head once more.

"It was then determined that in order to succeed whomever we sent to infiltrate must go in alone." Charlie stopped agony lacing his voice as he swallowed compulsively before continuing. "No back up, no contact, nothing. Only Bob, Martin Richards, the head of CID," Charlie explained to Alan and Larry as everyone else in the car was aware. "And the Joint Chiefs even knew of the operation much less the agents name. All contact was cut off and until the operation succeeded or failed no help or information was to be provided."

"Damn." Don whispered unable to even comprehend how alone and scary that must have been for the agent involved.

"It was the guy." Megan started to say before realizing Charlie had never told them the name of the man he was so obviously in love with.

Charlie nodded before once more picking up his story. "We knew going in that this was going to be a long, deep, undercover assignment. I don't think either of us realized how long term it was going to be." Charlie admitted ruefully as the SVU turned off onto a gravel road. "Then as you are all aware last month we got a break and were able to create a situation that would prove so threatening that the mole we were seeking would be forced to take action and it worked." Charlie couldn't keep the pride out of his voice that this assignment was at last finally over.

"So you knew all along that Colby was a double agent." David said feeling hurt and betrayed that Charlie had allowed them to get close to and care about that apparent traitor.

"Yes," Charlie admitted, "Just not in the way you think." Charlie's admission forestalling the fury that had been about to erupt in his direction.

"Charlie where are we going?" Megan asked her eyes shining with hope as she began to pray she knew what Charlie was about to admit.

"We're going to an NSA safe house." Charlie's answering smile fueling the hope in Megan's heart. "Amita is going to meet us there so I can finally introduce my family to the man who has just finished serving his country in the most amazing way, as well as being someone I love a great deal." Charlie took a deep breath and let loose an infectious laugh that at last there were going to be no more secrets, "By the way I forgot to tell you his name." Charlie's eyes twinkled with amusement. "It's Colby Granger." Charlie collapsed against the front seat as if now that he'd revealed all there was nothing left holding him up.

The car remained quite for what seemed like an eternity till a high pitched, what could only be called a squeal, erupted from Megan as she threw her arms around Larry and began to laugh and sob at the whole time.

David looked at Charlie with shock and disbelief. His emotion fluctuating wildly between happy, hurt, confusion, relief. He couldn't seem to settle on any one emotion his only thought as tears began to form behind his eyes was that he hadn't been wrong. He hadn't been wrong, he hadn't trusted the wrong man. And as the tears broke from his eyes he allowed the emotions of relief and happiness come to the forefront, knowing that though he would have to deal with the feelings of anger and betrayal it wouldn't happen today. Today he was going to get to see the man who'd become his best friend over the last two years and know he hadn't been wrong.

Don's eyes were locked with Charlie's, his breathing erratic and the facade of so called fearless leader cracking under the weight of Charlie's revelation. "Oh this time." he muttered at last, grateful that he hadn't had a traitor working under him but feeling so very confused and hurt at the same time.

"Please understand, Don." Charlie hated that this situation that started so many years ago was causing his brother pain, "I couldn't tell you, I wanted to so badly, so did Colby." Charlie grabbed Don's arm trying to somehow make him understand. "I didn't even know the Chinese were sending Colby to infiltrate your team until he showed up. We were sworn to secrecy."

Don allowed this information to swirl around in his head and found that it helped to know. Don knew once the rational part of his brain kicked in he'd have no trouble accepting the decisions that had been made. After all he would have made them himself.

It was at that moment that the SUV began to slow down in front of a rather impressive wooden house nestled in the woods. Charlie seeing the acceptance begin to slowly enter Don's eyes Charlie smiled and squeezed Don's arm one last time before jumping out of the car and running towards the house letting out a loud whoop of joy as Colby stepped out the front door and the two men collided in a fierce embrace.

"God, I've missed this." Colby whispered into Charlie's curls finally letting go of the assignment that had ruled his life for the past six years.

Behind them Amita smiled warmly glad that at last Charlie was free to be the amazing man he was meant to be.

Colby released Charlie at last as he dimly heard the other doors to the SUV open and close. Pulling back Colby watched as his teammates, Larry, and Alan made their way towards the house. Colby found he couldn't hold back a sigh of relief as he found no recrimination in the eyes of his friends. There was hurt there, but it was overshadowed by relief and happiness. Gripping Charlie's hand tightly Colby said the only thing that came to mind. "Anybody want a beer?"

"How 'bout some Scotch?" Alan asked with a grin as he pulled Colby into a tight hug, after the car ride we've just had I think it's going to take more then beer."

Everyone found themselves laughing hysterically at that knowing that while not that funny it was a very true statement.

"Well then come on in. Director Tompkins left just the thing." Amita spoke up at last from the doorway opening the door wide for the weary and elated group to enter. "I'm sure you still have a lot of questions.

"Yeah like how the hell are you an NSA agent." David agreed as he teasingly bumped shoulders with Amita as he passed in the house.

"Please what I want to know is where she keeps her gun." Don joined in smiling widely.

"No place you'll ever see, Agent Epps." Amita teased back as everyone made their way inside, finally coming together with no secrets between them. It should prove to an interesting evening.

The End.


End file.
